Tuesday, June 30, 2009

June 30th 2009

I have received two lovely awards in the past week - thank you Mary Ellen and Mel. I feel so honoured! I have been working on my picture, taking my time and enjoying it. I do a little every day. I have my sewing machine out and have gathered some fabric and trimmings to make some little bags. I like lots of variety in my creativity and am looking forward to doing something different.

I spent Sunday feeling sad, frustrated, angry and just about every other emotion you can think of. Talked to both of my daughters and woke up Monday feeling like it was all over and I had moved on from the upset of the weekend. Moved on. I will be there for my daughters if they need to talk but I am finished with that part of my life. It will always be there but it doesn't have the power to upset me for any length of time.

All during December, January and February I had this terrible sense of forboding, I had no idea why and I was feeling rather frightened by it. Now, five months later I feel my life crashing around me yet again. My most important relationships are changing, I have no idea where they are going and it's pretty unsettling, however, I feel stronger now than when my life has crashed around me in the past. Change! Always change! Where will it take me this time?

4 comments:

  1. Contragulations to the award and you well deserved it!

    It is such an inspiration to see our elders so willingly to accept changes and honest about the fear of it. You're such a loving strong woman and I really feel lucky to be in your company. You don't begin to know of your influence on me! :)

    May your change bring you joy! ;)

    BTW, I have just written a post on Inner Critic after I read of your earlier post on the same topic. You might want to read about it.

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  2. I think there must be some sort of Universal upheaval at the moment - I've felt similarly for the last while....everything has an undercurrent of turmoil about it but nothing specific I can define...

    I think just recognizing it for what it is is the first, important step and then just being open and accepting of what it will bring is the next...still working on that part myself..;)

    Deep breaths, my Dear...and lots of paint and fabric...:)

    ~much love~

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  3. It always takes us onwards... Ride that rollercoaster... It is so in the air at the moment... No idea why! *hug*

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  4. Sounds like you are riding these particular waves pretty skillfully. I'm looking forward to the ongoing creativity - nice to know about the seasonal wreathes.

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